My Year Of Eating Like The World Ended – [Report 0.5 – The Honeymoon Period]

9.6.2018 – Thursday

Started the morning off like most others, with a big cup of iced coffee.  No news though, which is my custom.  It’s all bad anyway – about the blight, and how many people are probably gonna die in the next several months.  My last trip to town gave me the sweats, but I did load up on some meat.  Of course, with grain stocks gone, the cows won’t be far behind, so meats will be out of the question too.  I’m planning to ration what I’ve got.  Basically, every steak, chicken breast, and pork chop I’ve got will get cut in half.  That still won’t get me to the end of the year, but it will double my supply and how long it lasts.  That’s not nothing.  Plus, my recent trade with Mike will get me a smidgeon of meat coming in on a regular basis, and I can always augment that with my own efforts.  This place is practically overrun with game, and there aren’t many people here to begin with, sooo….

Anyway, this is the Honeymoon period.  It doesn’t really feel like anything has changed.  I’ve got scads of food and will spend the week eating the stuff my neighbors gave me as part of the get-well package as I continue to recover from those nasty spider bites.  Right now, it feels like camping, only inside.  And for a whole year.

I don’t think the enormity of it has really hit me yet, but I’m sure it will.  For the next couple weeks, I’ll be eating casseroles, homemade soups, and raiding my impressive stock of dollar store frozen dinners (single guy food).  I’ve got enough of that kind of thing to last me through the end of this month, at least, so until that kind of stuff is gone, I don’t expect that things will feel any different at all, really.

I am a little bummed and nervous that the freeze-dried stuff will be delayed a bit.  That’s a big, important component of the stuff that’s gonna keep me alive over the next twelve months, but – I always say that although I’m not the smartest guy in the room, I AM consistently clever.  Clever’s not as good as smart, but it’s more versatile.  More flexible.  Time to put that to the test and see if I’m right, or if I’m just bullshitting myself.

Breakfast this morning was a big heaping plate of chicken casserole. (est. 700 calories) No idea what’s in it, or what the calorie count is:  I see chicken, croutons on the top, and if I had to guess, cream of chicken soup in the innards.  Will take a picture of the SECOND casserole just like it I’ve got sitting in the freezer.

Probably have more of that for lunch too, since it’s perishable.  May as well load up and enjoy while I’ve got it.  Won’t have it for very long. So…”just” 365 days to go!  😉
Lunch:  More chicken casserole.  (est. 700 calories) Had a cookies and cream pop tart for an evening snack (calories: 400).  LOTS of coffee.  Right now, things don’t feel any different at all.  Business as usual.  Working, watching videos on Amazon Prime…just doing my thing.

Dinner:  Nothing.  Still stuffed with chicken casserole.

Coffee: 300 calories for the day

Total Calories for the day: 2100

** Estimating my coffee habit’s calorie count:  Got some info from here: https://www.aquaspresso.co.za/many-calories-average-cup-coffee/

I drink a shitton of coffee…’bout two pots a day.  And based on the figures I’m pulling from the link referenced above, I’m estimating that my coffee habit adds about 300 calories per day to my total intake since I’ve just about always got a cup in hand.

Friday 09.07.2018

Breakfast:  Cherry pop tart (pack of two) (400 calories)

Lunch: 2 Philly Cheese Steak Hot Pockets (480 calories) **Note – I didn’t have the boxes for the cherry pop tarts or the philly cheese steak ones, so I just grabbed the boxes I had, and will assume that there’s not an enormous amount of difference between the various types.  For that reason, this isn’t as exact as I’d like, but…those boxes are at the landfill.

Dinner: Yet more chicken casserole. (est. 700 calories) I like it, but…I think I’m starting to reach my fill line where that’s concerned.  Of course, next up will be the big stash of dollar store boxed dinners I bought last month, which is a definite step down.  I’ll almost certainly miss it when it’s gone.  Boring writing today.  Kinda bummed, but not because of the food.  Right now, the food’s great.  And plentiful.

Used the last of my current gallon of milk.  Have a half gallon in the freezer but leaving it there for the time being.

Haven’t gotten the first gallon from my trade deal with Mike, but I have an answer for that.  I’ve got 8 cans of Carnation condensed milk.  So, I saved the milk jug, gave it a good rinse, poured the condensed milk into it, along with a can of water (then added a bit more after taste testing).

It’s got a different flavor, but it’s not bad, and will certainly work well enough for coffee.  Problem solved, and seven more cans to tide me over until I get the first fruits from the trade deal.  I’ll likely use a can of that stuff a day.  May experiment with adding more water to see if I can stretch it out a bit further.  So far, I regard this as an extremely minor challenge.

The thing is – although a year’s unquestionably a long time, I think I can come close to getting to the end of the month without even touching the supplies in the pantry.  Will just focus on the boxed dinners and other random stuff in the kitchen itself, so odds are, I’ll only dip into the pantry stocks nominally from now until October.  Then, shit gets real.

Total Calories for the day; 1880 (**includes est. 300 calories for the coffee habit)

Saturday 09.08.2018

Breakfast: 2 pop tarts (400 calories)

Lunch: Yet more chicken casserole (est. 700 calories)

Dinner: Some of the neighbor’s beef soup (est. 500 calories)

Beastly rains today.  Literally all day.  Phone kept going off with flash flood alerts, which I laughed at.  If I have to worry about flash flooding where I live, then the whole of the Eastern Seaboard is basically gone.

Nonetheless, Galax itself got hammered pretty hard.  Flooding in town, and many of the streets closed.  Here’s what the townies were dealing with:

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10218064827439242&id=1443612551

(video taken late Saturday night/early Sunday morning)

The heavy rains didn’t really impact me.  I had TONS of writing to do, and spent all day writing about shit.  Literally.  Sixteen articles for a septic tank company.  Long day.  Brain feels like Jell-O.  Didn’t even get to see the sun.  Just staring at the monitor all day.

Total Calories for the day: 1900 (**Includes 300 calories for my coffee habit))

Synopsis:

About what I expected for the first, abbreviated week.  Nothing out of the ordinary, and nothing unusual.  That will, of course, change over time.  Once I burn through the kitchen stocks and have to start dipping into the pantry, it will start feeling a lot more like a crisis, but for the moment, it’s easy.

It would be a mistake for me to use this week as a template to guide my thinking about how the rest of the year will go though, and it’s not one I intend to make.  I will enjoy the abundance while I’ve got it, but I can already see the writing on the wall.

Weight:  333 lbs.

BP: 124/88

Also, as promised, here’s a picture of me at the start of this adventure.  Will compare this to pictures taken at various points along the way and at the end to see how much of a difference there is.

4 comments

  1. I’ve had the thought of trying this sort of thing myself. Lack of funds prevents me from stocking up to try it…. however depending upon your results I may try living off the land for an extended time to see what happens. I’d live to lose weight and I think the apocolypse diet may be just the ticket as exercise will be of paramount importance in hunting/gathering of food stuffs. Looking forward to your reports as time goes on.

    1. I think that would be a fantastic experiment, David! Let me know if you decide to give that a go…I’d follow that one in a heartbeat! 🙂

  2. It sounds solid. Don’t get discouraged. There are a ton of people following you, who are very interested in the outcome. This sacrifice is for all of us!👍

    1. Thanks man! Yeah – i’m a bit stunned at the interest this generated. Very pleasantly surprised! Not something I was expecting, and my hope is that it’s a memorable journey for me and everyone who’s watching as it unfolds!

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